DOLLY CALLS OUT THE HATERS

wow. this report from a dolly parton concert just saved my whole week.

"Poor little Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan," Parton said at her concert
last night at L.A.'s Greek Theatre. "Ain't it awful? If those little girls slept
with as many men as they say in the tabloids, why their little butts would have
more fingerprints than the FBI!"

AND

"People are always asking me in interviews, 'What do you think of foreign
affairs?' I just say, 'I've had a few.' "And the boob jokes were aplenty. "They
say, 'What do you think about global warming?' " Parton said. "I say, 'If my
globes get too warm, I just take my sweater off.' "

AND

She performed a honky-tonked cover of the Fine Young Cannibals' "She
Drives Me Crazy"

as my pal kristina (who found the thing) put it: "all this depressing news all the time, and then dolly parton puts a great spin on it."